8/8/23 This journey is really forcing me to be so open and honest with myself and to drop ALL of the egoic bullshit and conditioning. I went to see my Healer Monday and literally just sat crying for an hour and a half, the egoic victim story just keeps coming up when I get hit hard with the feelings and emotions and literal reality of my life. Dan died, it was cruel that he suffered, I’m now alone, grieving, with two kids under 5, trying to sort his estate is ridiculous, it is NOT a simple process and I’ve managed to sort ONE thing – taking his name off our contents and car insurance. That’s it. They want certified copies of fucking everything and take forever to process anything. I very much underestimated the time it will take to sort his estate, so I have decided to drop any timeframe or pressure as I thought, oh I’ll take a month off social media, that will be plenty of time to sort his estate, sort the house, gain clarity on what I want to do with my business, grieve – UM NO.NO IT IS NOT.