I don’t need to try convince people who aren’t my people to be my people
29/2/24
I continue to be surprised at just the relentlessness of life, when all I want is to just go so fucking SLOW. But I can’t, I have two young kids, it is FULL ON, and it is really pushing me to my physical and mental/emotional limits. I had a breakdown and cry in the car today while dropping the kids off. My head has gone all overwhelmed and dizzy/spacy again – and this is a real thing, it’s a symptom of my body just constantly berated and stuck in survival mode, high stress, high grief, fight or flight and freeze (i’m not really a fawner lol). While the somatic exercise I have started doing have made some changes in my tummy with the bloating and feeling sometimes calmer, it hasn’t stopped my grief, it hasn’t improved my insomnia, because lets face it my body is in a very heightened state and has been for well over a year – its gonna take some time to see results, I really hope as I continue to do these exercises that I see more improvements. On another note with that I didn’t think about loosing weight and I don’t have scales or anything so I don’t know if i’ve lost weight in that respect, but I have lost 7cm around my hips and belly in a month – just from doing somatic exercises for like 5-10 mins a day and not even everyday as I often skip a day if i’m struggling. It shows that stress and a dysregulated nervous system CAN have you hold onto weight. I didn’t measure myself at the beginning of the course but I have probably overall lost more than that. I think that’s pretty cool! My clothes are fitting nicer and I feel lighter and more comfortable in my own skin as I often felt super heavy and bloated and blah.
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